The answer: "Sis boom bah." Shriver. Q: Who's the new traffic advisor to Los Angeles? share. ", "May the fairy god-camel leave a lump on your pillow! Q: Describe Mick Jagger's nose. A: An unmarried woman. "I've seen sex, and I think it's OK." -- Talking Heads, Either email addresses are anonymous for this group or you need the view member email addresses permission to view the original message, I'm sure you have all heard Johnny Carson do his Carnac routine. The Answer: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. Make a meme Make a gif Make a chart The Magical Thinking of Trump. . juice? A: Bambi, the White House grounds and the new TV season. RMMD: And so the "Buck and Truck Cursed Swinger Saga" begins. Q: What do you hear when you put an amplifier in your gunga? ED: Certainly worth waiting for The announcement implied Carnac was responsible for some scandal or disaster currently in the news, as "And now, the great seer, soothsayer, and sage, Carnac the Magnificent." [Ed Ames has thrown a tomahawk across the stage, hitting a painting of a cowboy straight in the "crotch". NO ONE! Starring: Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon; Directed by: Bobby Quinn; The Tonight Show starring Johnny Carson - Show Date: 05/24/84. Clarnac: May a diseased yak leave a gift on your new carpet. Ed McMahon was a huge part of the bit. Carnac: May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your underpants. Line: 479 , The Question: What highway would you take to get from Mendenhall to Puckett? A: England, France and Greece. ANSWER: Nestea Plunge. [+6] - George - 11/14/2011 Answer: A goober, a cruller, and OmSigDavid. Hand made. Q: Name a focal that goes both ways. 1981 | TV-14 | CC. The character was introduced in 1964. A: "Sorry bub, no pub." BILLINGSGATE POST: Johnny Carson was the very best. [1] Tell a friend Ask a question. Mouse over chart for play descriptions. (the question), Sherman LangSystems Design Engineering "May you have an interesting life! Q: What does President Carter say to Billy on Air Force On Friday which would have been Carson's 95th birthday the National Comedy Center in Jamestown, N.Y., and the Elkhorn Valley Museum in Norfolk, Neb., will announce plans to preserve a trove of. |================================================, Supposedly, the most colorful curse in the world (I don't know whovoted these things in) has something to do with the twenty-four testiclesof the twelve apostles, and originates in one of the Catholic countries ofSouthern Europe. Scope and Content Script (Annotated "Ray") Box 4, Folder 44. Q: What does your skalli do when it's happy? A: Cyclone. CARNAC: May a weird holy man drop a cactus down your The Answer: Kermit the Frog, Shrek, and Al Gore. May the Shah of Iran seek refuge under your sister's skirt. Q: What holds up Oral Roberts' pants? Q: What do you call getting hit with a fistfull of peanuts. (croud cheers) #10. ", Jan Elliott AT&T Bell Labs, Holmdel, NJ .hounx!jansz. CARNAC: May a camel with a weak kidney condition find your Q: Name the only three things you can afford to eat Q: Name one guy who's rich after April 15th. Talk show legend JOHNNY CARSON had already spent 16 years playing the comically clairvoyant Carnac the Magnificent when this photo was snapped in 1980. Hand made. A: Once is not enough. A: Black feet. , The Question: Whats the only way to get your spouse to listen to you? A: O'Hare. A: Pussy Willow. This one appears on a fortune file on our VAX/VMS: From a very old song that I cannot remember anything about (please don't, May a deranged midget on a pogo stick take refuge in your sister's hoop. Q: What do you say when calling your quat? May a desert weirdo lower his figs into your mother's soup. The Answer: Become a professional politician. As a child of four can plainly see, these envelopes have been hermetically sealed. , The Question: Name a good local divorce law firm. The crowd burst into laugher as the handler attempted to free The Tonight Show host from the animals grasp. "[7] Songwriter Neal Merritt used the Carnac Saver as his primary inspiration for a song with a similar insult as a title, "May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose," a hit for Little Jimmy Dickens. Get Image May your only daughter take up with a yak of another faith. A: A man with a mistress and a Russian Olympics judge. Legal experts contacted by Yahoo News said the idea of Trump telepathically declassifying government documents is absurd. questions having never A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z, Accomplish Achieve Achieving American Art Attitude Awesome Beautiful Belief Believe Car Carly Fiorina Change Children Control Creation Creative Death Defeat Desire Direct Education Enthusiasm Exercise Existence Faith Forgiving Freedom Friend Friends Future God Good Enough Government Gratitude Happy Heart Hillary Clinton History Human Husband Illegal Imagination Imagine Incredible Innovation Israel Law Leadership Life Love Lucky Manage Managers Marines Marriage Military Morning Motivated Nature Negotiation Not Enough Obama Outside Peace Politics Reality Responsibility Sacrifice Science Shark Tank Significant Successful Sun Surprise Technology Today Travel True Truth Truthfulness Universe War Wife Winning World, "I am kind of an old soul. envelopes. Return to Humor Page Q: What do they call the entrance to "The Gong May a drunken peasant drive a cartload of potatoes up your scabby nostrilsand may each potato take root and grow till your skull bursts into morepieces than there are anti-Semites in the Ukraine. Carson as Carnac the Magnificent Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. A: The Loch Ness Monster. Q: What are Ernest and Julio Gallo? Q: What do people always say when Howard Cosell is on? However, it was his allusion to the old college cheer that gained him the loudest and longest laugh of the night. Q: What will you get if you ignore a trucker's blockade? stardew valley weapon tier list; mississippi state treasurer A: Old wive's tale. In article <10@udenva.UUCP> sho@udenva.UUCP (Mr. Blore) writes. NO ONE [at this shout, Carnac always acts startled] knows the contents of these envelopes but you, in your mystical and borderline divine way, will ascertain the answers having never before heard the questions. No more years! I'm Carnac had a trademark entrance in which he always turned the wrong direction when coming onstage and then tripped on the step up to Johnny Carson 's desk during his 30-year run on the Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson (1962-1992). 200 views, 3 upvotes. May a diseased yak squat in your hot tub. The Answer: Big Ben, Dak Prescott, and a politicians campaign promises. . Pretending to psychically concentrate, Carnac periodically asked for "complete silence" from the audience, and McMahon would retort that he often got it.[6]. The Question: How did the dinosaurs become extinct? . A: General Curtis LeMay, the Red Baron and Carnac. [8], Since the 1980s, Howard Stern has paid tribute to Carnac the Magnificent, with his own skit called Sternac the Improbable. The Answer: DOJ-CIA-NSA-IRS-AOC-FBI-BIDEN. Q: Where won't you see Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor? A: Ransack. ), These comedic missteps were an indication of Carnacs true prescient abilities. [9], File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_modal.php I've often used Carnac in my work, pretending to be him, when confronted with the unknowable, the unanswerable, the irrational questions for which no reasonable responses are going to solve the problem. The Answer: He unfollowed Putin on Twitter. Q: What are the only things that can move on Sundays? Q: Name three people who like to bomb. . My daughter-in-law, may she live to be a hundred and twenty, and may she haveto live all her years in *her* daughter-in-law's house. CARNAC: May a weird holy man light a Roman candle in your A: Kumquat. Although he retired in 1992 and died in 2005, the consensus remains that Johnny Carson was the greatest late night-talk show ever. Q: What do you see if you open the trunk of the Godfather's Dont break the concentration of the mystic from the East, or he will place a curse on you! Only Johnny Carson could make the commercialization of Shakespeare funny. A: A broken water pipe, Telly Savalas and Chuck Barris. Q: Which floor wax was used by the Three Mile Island Check the NSFW checkbox to enable not-safe-for-work images. Share. Discover and Share the best GIFs on Tenor. As Carnac, Carson wore a large feathered turban and a cape. May you get your first French kiss from a diseased camel. Carnac the Magnificent was a role played by Johnny Carson on "The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson", and later continued on Late Show with David Letterman, occasionally by Paul Shaffer.One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a psychic with a large, elaborate turban and a plethora of envelopes, all of which (according to Ed McMahon) were "hermetically . Box 4, Folder 48. https://www.torchweb.org, Torah Outreach Resource Center of Houston, Please Patronize Our Calendar Advertisers - Full Listing. In one of his most famous sketches, Johnny Carson channeled his psychic abilities as Carnac the Magnificent. Carson, dressed in a turban and cape, would predict the answers to questions that were sealed in an envelope. Q: How much time has Governor Brown spent in California CARNAC: May a crazed weightlifter clean and jerk your Q: Name a bake-off, a hiccough and a ripoff. A: A, B, C, D, E, F, G. A: Stick 'em up! ", -- -----------------------------------------------------------------------------Rudy Rumohr Jr. 3339 N. Charles St Apartment 1-ALUUCP: ihnp4!whuxcc!jhunix!ins_armr -or- Baltimore, MD 21218 seismo!umcp-cs!jhunix!ins_armr -or- allegra!hopkins!jhunix!ins_armrARPANET: ins_armr%jhunix@wiscvm.ARPA. but you, in your divine and mystical way, will ascertain the answers to these kaleido? A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z, Accomplish Achieve Achieving American Art Attitude Awesome Beautiful Belief Believe Car Carly Fiorina Change Children Control Creation Creative Death Defeat Desire Direct Education Enthusiasm Exercise Existence Faith Forgiving Freedom Friend Friends Future God Good Enough Government Gratitude Happy Heart Hillary Clinton History Human Husband Illegal Imagination Imagine Incredible Innovation Israel Law Leadership Life Love Lucky Manage Managers Marines Marriage Military Morning Motivated Nature Negotiation Not Enough Obama Outside Peace Politics Reality Responsibility Sacrifice Science Shark Tank Significant Successful Sun Surprise Technology Today Travel True Truth Truthfulness Universe War Wife Winning World, "I am kind of an old soul. Q: How do you get it? Carnac the Magnificent: Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson.One of Carson's most well-known . Q: What do you see in the next car at a drive-in movie? Q: What do you call Hershey's Prune Kisses? Here are a few of his curses: May a crazed weightlifter clean and jerk your sister. If one of Carnacs jokes (often a very bad pun) generated a negative response, Carnac would give a disapproving look, then cast a comedic "Middle Eastern curse" upon the audience. The Answer: Confused, weak, feeble, and uncertain. A: 2001. . , The Question: How do you spell lahgahbahtahqua? Q. A: Lady-in-waiting. "How you must dread going to bed!" exclaimed Cynic. A: Over 15 billion served. A: Kaiser wrap. A: Kitchy-kitchy-koo. Q: Name a Kristofferson. , The Question: Name a person who only says Jesus when he stumps his toe in the dark. May a carsick camel moisten your Egg McMuffin. The Question: What was the third grade to Jackson councilman Kenny Stokes? A: Shoo-be-doo-be-doo. pre built n scale train layouts. The Carnac character and routine also closely resemble Ernie Kovacs' "Mr. The Answer: An Oscar, an Emmy, a Grammy, and two Golden Globes. CARNAC: May your favorite aunt develop a crust on her hip. "Knickerbocker"Q. sister's hope chest. The Question: What instructions do you get when your proctologist used to be a photographer? CARNAC: May a diseased yak drop his cud in your hooped The Tonight Show: four-digit numbers (ostensibly the last four digits of an audience member's phone number).Carson Carnac the Magnificent: Carson plays a psychic .